Monday, February 4, 2013


So Monday is the day our family normally gets up and going and out the door by 7:45.  Robbie woke up not feeling well so we decided to rest and let Tate rest too.  We slept in until 8:00 I think ha!  We went about our day eating, straightening, playing, cleaning up the normal Monday things.  I ate lunch and then began to not feel well.  I have been having off and on spurts of this low energy, heavy breathing issue for about 3 weeks at this point so I went to lay down like normal.  I had been given an inhaler the week before for what they thought was bronchitis so I laid down and immediately knew I would need my inhaler so I went down stairs straight outside on the snowy drive in my socks and grabbed my inhaler in the car.  I took it and laid on the couch.  I kept saying to Robbie, "I can't breathe, I can't breathe."  As any sweet husband would do he sat with me and asked what I wanted him to do.  I didn't know I had never felt this way before, I wanted to get my breath I wanted to breathe fully.  So after my body began to shake and I continued to complain he called 911.  They arrived quickly and in the meantime I told Robbie to take Tate upstairs.  I didn't want him to see anything.  The EMT began to give me breathing treatments and oxygen.  I remember two main things while riding backwards in the ambulance 1) I am gonna puke if I don't focus on one spot on the wall 2) the EMT (who was maybe 30) asking me questions the main one being something like this "So you have three boys, did you have them all at the same time or separately?" After laughing in my head and maybe swinging my head swiftly and staring blankly I finally replied, "Oh separately I had them separately."  And then we arrived at the hospital and they wheeled me inside in my flowy dress shirt and cords (seriously I rarely get dressed for the day and I was so thankful I was dressed)!  Then I waited not feeling any better with nurses and doctors looking at me like I had lost my mind.  My oxygen was normal my heart was normal but my chest was tight and my breathing was difficult.  Finally Robbie was able to come after dropping the kids off at a friend's house and my lab results were in.  Low potassium was the only thing they could find!  After the second doctor came in and told me they would like to keep me overnight to give me potassium through IV and monitor my levels I looked to google to find out answers to my questions about potassium.  Apparently it's pretty essential for your organs to function.  So we began to plan for what would take place for our kiddos overnight and Robbie left to get phone chargers.  I had been in the ER for almost 6 hrs now.  When he arrived they had taken me to my room and I had never been so thankful for a room and kind nurses!

I of course texted my Mama this picture I am ok I am in a room here's my legs :)  Anyway, after 2 nights and almost 3 days away from my boys, no real reasons for my body's behavior I was rip roaring to get outta there!  Also, with a little 1 year old who was sicky poo at home I was maybe a little impatient and restless with the nurses' "when the doctor gets your paper's ready I'll be able to proceed with dismissal" statement!  Thankfully, I had a note staring at me and many texts from friends and family that were praying for me, that gave me a peace that I know was from HIM.

Robbie and two out of three of my boys were their to pick me up and head home so I could go home and be mommy to little sick one.  And to beat the band MY Mama was at home to greet me too!  She hops on a plane when her little girl's sick so she can take care of me and her grandbabies!  

I have been helped out with my kiddos,  meals brought,  loved on and prayed for these last few days and it has been such a blessing.  And today I woke up once again with pain but with a new sense of peace.  Pauls' words are scrolling in my head today from Phil. 4:11 "for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content."  Hmmm, have I been content, have I been even thankful, joy-filled?  No, I can honestly say I more than likely have been none of these.  I have so much to be thankful for, it sounds so clichĂ© right?!?! But really I do!  So today amidst not feeling great at all I wanted to write... get it out somewhere...process what I have gone through in the last week and also to write what I am so forever grateful for in my life.

My best friend and husband Robbie, has loved me since I was 16 seriously that's almost 14 years ya'll!  He is so patient with me, he teaches me to SLOOOOOOOWWWW down even when I don't want to.  He cleans a bathroom like no other :)  He is the best daddy you will ever meet, patiently and faithfully reads the bible to his boys every night, teaches them more in an hour at night than I do all day,  has been patient and loving with me as I learn to be a mommy to our three boys and has pushed me to pursue my passion of photography.  I'll forgive you one day for letting them cut Tuck's curls off and I know I know I owe you a picture of all three boys together!  I love you!

Tate, my first born, my sweet tender hearted, tigger spring in his tail at any meal but can sit as still as a mouse in a movie, little, I mean big 6 year old toothless grinning boy.  The one who makes me laugh everyday, who helps me to see my own strong will every day and who teaches me so much about Jesus and many Bible stories.  You have toys beyond measure but you always make me giggle when you ask me to print off some character of a movie that you just watched!  Paper printables make you happy:)!  You hopefully are getting my love for organizing a little and are teaching your brothers all about being BIG and all the best dance moves! You are a blessing son and I love you so!

Tucker, oh Tuck, my little JOY filled boy!  I literally have to pray every morning that God gives me energy to match yours!  You wake up on full blast, never slowly, and remind me each day how FULL life really can be!  You have such a sweet spirit and are so quick to apologize each day when you accidentally hit someone with a puck or ball!  You are so very picky about food unless we feed you straight sugar all day, then you're good!  You have a special love for hockey and zambonis!  It's so special and unbelievable that God allowed you to look just like me when I was little and yet still have daddy's eyes!  My goal is to put together a book for you one day to show you all the different ways that you fell asleep as a little 2 year old, it's quite entertaining!  Thanks little man for showing me JOY and life on FULL speed!  

And Ty, our sweet little boy who we thought would be our girl!  God surprised us with you and your dimply grin! You are sweet and snuggly, and stubborn if given a bottle.  You have listened to Kari Jobe to go to sleep probably every night since you were born!  You LOVE LOVE LOVE your Mama and I like that!  We have so much to learn about you and I am so excited to see what God has in store for you!  Thanks for loving so sweetly and for having dimples (I prayed a lot when I was little that I would somehow get dimples, you having them is even better)!  And don't worry you will soon be as fast as the other two and will get to go to all the magical places they get to, like SportsClips and the carwash!

I'm thankful for these sweet blessings in my life!  Hope it doesn't take a trip to the hospital again to be reminded!

1 comment:

Michelle Smith said...

Holly, so sorry you are not feeling well again today.
I love your writing and your boys are just beautiful!
You are in my prayers. Hopefully, you will have answers soon!